No Words to Describe

Where do I start? Today is the day we've been anticipating for. It's A Day in the Secret Place - a day of soaking in the presence of God and praying for Malaysia, in conjunction with Malaysia's 53th Independence Day. I know we've always been doing this, utilising public holidays to set a day of prayer and worship, but today is just ... different. One of the reasons is because we have invited an Evangelist to share a message with us and impart God's grace for evangelism to us; another is because it's one of the few times our church is packed during A Day in the Secret Place. Packed until seats need to be added at the back! Woot!

Evangelist Philip Yeoh (or Brother Philip Yeoh, as he likes to be known) is 70 years old this year, but he looks like just in his 50s, full of the zeal and compassion for the lost, full of the anointing for God, full of the power of Holy Spirit. His hair looks as though it has just begun to grey, not turning white for a long time yet. And his voice... the hymns that he sang... now I know the power of hymns...

Brother Philip shared a lot of testimonies with us. He says, there are many people who waited until their last days before making the decision to go to heaven. There are people who believed but chose to go to heaven empty handed, without any rewards. There are even people who are OCBC (Orang Christian Bukan Christian). But we only have one life, and with this one life, we MUST be CIMB (Christian Ini Memang Bagus!) and serve God gao gao (to the max). If you think evangelism is difficult, let me tell you, it's not. If a 70-year-old uncle can be on fire for God still and been winning more than 1000 souls; if a bedridden aunty who has just received Christ tells her fellow bedridden patients that she's not afraid of death because she now has a passport to heaven; if a taxi driver tells his fellow taxi driver friends that he goes to visit his rich Father every Sunday; if a prisoner on his death roll takes the only 1 hour he has a day to share with his inmates and asked for more and more Bibles to be brought into the prison -- YOU can do it. WE can do it. I, Stacy Phang, commit to do it!

There are many ways to witness Christ. Sometimes you may meet this person whom you think it's pretty impossible to talk to him/her about Jesus, but God is the One who commissioned us, so He has all the answers. Ask Him for wisdom and understanding, and obey. Sometimes we have the fear of rejection in us and it inhibits us from sharing Christ, but think about this: what's the worst that can happen? If the person you're reaching out rejects what you say, or at worst, rejects you altogether, are you losing anything? Maybe the friendship, but in heaven, God has credited a reward to your account just based on your obedience of sharing the gospel and doing the Great Commission. We won't lose; in fact we gain, because we are already winners and victors when we believe in Jesus.

This is just the first part of today, which built up to the second part - the showing of Jaeson Ma's 1040 movie.



The 1040 movie is about nations in Asia that is situated in the 10-40 Altitude on the world map. These include China, Korea, Taiwan, Hong Kong, Singapore, Indonesia. It's a testimonial movie that interviewed many pastors, church leaders, Christian celebrities, ministers of God from these nations and the move of God in Asia. When I watched that, I just thank God and treasured my heritage as an Asian, especially a Chinese Malaysian. I felt so much like crying as I watched the mighty move of God swept through these nations, but there was no tears; yet I know deep inside me my spirit was crying, crying out to God, crying out for Him to move in Malaysia, in our midst. The urgency...

After that, we went into another round of worship. If the first and second round was already awesome and more awesome, this last round just has no words to describe. I stood there at the 2nd keyboard and I just felt like I shouldn't be standing there; I shouldn't be playing at all, that it wasn't right for me to be worshiping with my instrument then. I wanted to kneel and prostate immediately and to just cry out to Him, but I stood on and played the keyboard. There's just no words to describe this accurate enough. I wanted to cry, but there was no tears. I didn't know what to do with my body; it felt so numb and blank and like there was nothing I could do to be able to express what my spirit was feeling. Finally, I just stopped playing and knelt down under the keyboard and put my head on the floor and just started crying out in my spirit (still no tears), crying out for Him to move in my life, crying out for Him to move in Malaysia, crying out for Him to save all my loved ones...

Now I truly know that I love Him more than anything, anyone. Because He first loved me.

Lord, whatever that You have started in me today, the fire, the sense of urgency, the responsibility, the stewardship You have entrusted to me, the people that You have placed in my life, the destiny You have written of my life - fulfil them, bring them to full completion. This, is the joy that You want us to have, the joy of being who we are meant to be. Your beloved.

The Smallest Rainbow

To those of you who drive, have you ever thought of how you can give thanks when there is a terrible jam and you're rushing for work? Every minute that ticks pass is another moment closer to the threat of being late, so what runs through your mind may be worry and anxiety more than a thanksgiving heart that rises to God. Well, I had the opportunity this morning to give thanks to God, because I saw something in the sky that was beautiful beyond description.

Two cranes flew by, heading towards the zoo. One particularly flew quite near to the cars in front, because at the stretch I was stuck at was a raised highway. I watched them as they glided through the sky, thinking how nice it would be if they were to flew pass above my car... We inched towards the turning to go down the slope, and as I was turning, I saw it. The sky was now brightly lit, although the thick clouds were a unique combination of reddish orange and grey. And there, in between two clouds was one small ray of rainbow. But there was no mistaking it.

I think I was the only one who actually saw that. Or at least I'd like to think it that way. The rainbow lasted for only about five minutes, and it faded. But for the longest time I just stared at it, one eye looking out at traffic and another just trying to drink in all the beauty in it...

It was so small... Just so small... I tried to look if there were other parts of it coming out in sky, but the clouds were too thick, that was the only gap that allowed the colourful ray to shine through. I couldn't take a picture of it, but there's no regret; it's forever etched in my heart.

I said a prayer to my Father. I need You, Lord. I know every time You show me this Rainbow of Promise, You're just telling me and assuring me of Your great love. Teach me what to do. Show me how, Lord. I need You.

And I gave thanks for the jam.

Jesus, all the answers and solutions are found in You. Even when sometimes we think there are questions that we have never thought about, questions that are essentially doubts, Lord, even these You have the answers to them. Even when things don't turn out the way we want them to, You have the solutions for them. And all we need to do is just to rest in You, rest in the assurance of Your goodness and mercy.

Father, I thank You. And I love You.